Overcome Narcissist Aftermath: Your Grief is Shared Fantasy, too!
Prof. Sam Vaknin
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Professor of Psychology, Business Management in CIAPS (Cambridge, Birmingham UK; Ontario, Canada; Lagos, Nigeria), SEEU (Visiting, N. Macedonia). Click on links below: smear campaign rebutted + my work, credentials in psychology. PhD in Physics. Visiting Professor of Psychology, Southern Federal University, Rostov-on-Don, Russia (2017-22). Former economic advisor to governments, multinationals. Founder Healthcare Committee, Macedonia. Columnist, editor. Narcissist or Psychopath in your life? Subject to abuse, heartbreak, dysfunctional relationships, violence, intimidation, stalking, or harassment? This is the channel for you: insider info, evidence-based tips, and time-tested advice. Based on the bible of narcissism: "Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited" by Sam Vaknin (1st edition 1999, 10th edition. in 2015). Resume/bio: http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/cv.html Tik-Tok https://www.tiktok.com/@narcissismwithvaknin?lang=en Twitter http://www.twitter.com/samvaknin
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Video Description
Grieving in the wake of narcissistic abuse is a fantasy. We mourn the shared fantasy via a fantasy of grief. We internalize the narcissist’s snapshot of us which started off as a mental representation of reality and then became an idealized, fantastic, constant, internal object. We do it to both please the narcissist and to answer the question: what does he want from me? (Lacan’s neurotic fantasy). Self-contained vs. incorporating fantasy: reality repressed or reframed (cathected fiction, symbols, signifying structure), involves compensatory wish fulfillment (future) or reconstruction (past): erotic, aggressive, self-aggrandising, ego-syntonic, soothing (defensive, to avoid trauma, Lacan), and experimental (testing out scenarios safely). In a shared fantasy, these roles are outsourced, allowing for passivity and a sense of safety and stability. In this sense, the intimate partner in a shared fantasy is rendered a borderline. Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3
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